belonging

I come from the fast pace and transition that is life in California.  My husband comes from a tiny town on a Tennessee mountain where the land is in your soul.  This place we now call home is just right for both of us in so many ways.  For us it is a via media if you will. 

One of the hardest transitions for me as a “newcomer” was figuring out how to fit into this new community.  I had tried all “the” things to make new friends.  

Art classes.  

Hanging out at the coffee shop.  

Volunteering with an agency that does amazing things for children.  

Reaching out to other newbies.  

Yet still I felt lonely.  This friend thing with other women is still a bit new to this tomboy me and seminary brought me the bestest of best.  Having lost physical proximity with those relationships left a gaping hole. 

I likely came off as needy and insecure in my desire to build relationships which may have pushed folks even further away.  After a few hurtful attempts at making new friends I withdrew into my own world of art and family and solitary pursuits. 

See, it is so hard to “break into” a community when you are new and those you meet have lived their whole life there.  

On top of that I am California through and through… I didn’t grow up at the beach, yet the lifestyle of a place forms so much of who we become...how we talk, how we dress, how we interact with others...so many things we just don't think about until we no longer have it.  

Oh and did I mention I am a female in ordained ministry? 

A part of me began to wither.  I spent much time praying to God about feeling lonely and stranded.

Then I “stumbled” upon this amazing book with words I could have written or if not written have thought once or twice.  

That book led me to this incredible on line community.  

This community has led me to a place I am beginning to form authentic relationships in new ways.  

Many of these women I will likely never meet face to face.  Yet many of them have been walking with me through a difficult time.  

They help me be brave.  

They help me find my voice when I lose it.

They have brought much joy into my heart and life.  

Yet mostly?  They helped me to find God in the desert again. 

There are some who blog words I know God meant just for me. 

There are some who take pictures that feed my soul.

There are some who create things I see when I close my eyes.

There are some who write books about being a woman, a child of God, a mom, a wife, a sister, or a friend that remind me I am not alone.

These women may never know how much I needed just what God gave them to share yet each one has helped me to find my way back to that place of feeling connected to other women.  Of reminding me that I belong.    

I thank God for this community and for leading me here as I searched for friendship.  

I pray it blesses you as it has blessed me.  

multitudes on (monday) tuesday ~ sept. 4th

it is monday  tuesday...

a day to remember those gifts

i already have 

thanks to the gift giver.

580 those who work hard to make my life easier

581 taking risks in the studio

582 bear made egg sandwiches topped with fresh tomatoes he grew

583 a spouse wanting to catch the spark that began on a mountain top

584 Bible study that feeds my weary soul

585 being wrapped in forgiving arms after difficult words

586 reminders that relationship aren’t about perfection and all about loving one another in the middle of our messes

587 a relaxing and easy lunch with a sister in Christ

588 baking communion bread with a loved one for those we both love

589 empty inboxes

590 praying with a sister for our girls who are mamas

591 pictures of da baby on my phone

592 for the reminder of why i do what i do

593 hearing da bear giggle as he watches a video

594 fresh figs delivered to my doorstep

595 sleeping in with da bear and da beast on a rainy holiday

596 seeing a boy i love becoming a daddy to be proud of

597 remembering drying time is blessed

598 words of epiphany… “His way past is so beyond our wildest imagination that it doesn’t necessarily mean it’s a matter of making us happy right here and now. His kingdom purposes are so beyond. They are so grand and are being worked out in such a way that they might be beyond our mental capacity to comprehend.” ~Phyllis Shirer

599 morning glories wrapping around fall tomatoes

what are you thankful for?

won't you link up with ann and friends at a holy experience and share yours too?

it is amazing how much we have to be grateful for, yes?

Happy Labor Day

to say thank you for those who work hard that my life is made easier, a prayer:

Almighty God, you have so linked our lives one with another that all we do affects, for good or ill, all other lives: So guide us in the  work we do, that we may do it not for self alone, but for the common good; and, as we seek a proper return for our own labor, make us mindful of the rightful aspirations of other workers, and arouse our concern for those who are out of work; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. 

Amen.

a song:

will catch up with Multitudes tomorrow.  May all who are weary rest this day.

suddenly september

seems like we were

just dreaming

of summer days

and now

it is september...

time for a season of changing...

leaves, weather, and activities.

and yet, the race continues,

though it's end is known

we forget.

Therefore, 

since we are surrounded 

by such a great cloud of witnesses, 

let us throw off everything 

that hinders 

and the sin that so easily entangles. 

And let us run with perseverance 

the race marked out for us.

Hebrews 12.1